The foreign travel advice has been updated. Again. Fortunately, Portgual has not changed so it is still on the amber list. No change is fine, although it would’ve been great if it had moved to the green list.
No problem though as my planning was on the assumption that Portugal would be on the amber list. Within an hour of the update, an email from the airline arrives confirming all the arrangements and requirements to travel.
The automatic payment for my accommodation has been processed. Now I’ve only got to complete the various paperwork and attend my PCR test appointment. No doubt there will be a few things that I’ve overlooked although I’ve still a little over a week to tackle anything that crops up.
While I remain reasonably fluid on my trip, several appointments are beginning to be firmed up. Although with the majority of Portugal still on their annual shutdown, responses are perhaps slower than usual. A gentle nudge this week will hopefully confirm a couple more appointments.
It’s exciting and jumping on a plane to Portugal is getting ever closer.
A couple of conversations over the last week or so have made me realise that I’m shifting. Not a word I would usually use, but it feels like a term that encompasses the transition.
These conversations were a little unexpected, but equally, conversations that I’ve been planning on having. So maybe it was just the timescale that just shifted. Sometimes that happens. That’s fine. Personally, I’m pleased I’ve had the conversations.
But shifting the timescale is a side effect of everything else shifting.
Maybe it’s because I’m getting a little older and wiser. Maybe it’s because I’m heading towards that time where I am less affected by other people’s thoughts and opinions. I continue to be (overly) sensitive and take things personally, but increasingly things are shifting.
What do I mean by I’m shifting?
I guess in summary it’s my mindset transferring into my actions. It is certainly happening as I invest a little more time in understanding myself. While there are many things I’m learning about myself, understanding why or how I act in the way I am is helping significantly.
Firstly, a better understanding of my introversion and how that has helped, or hindered, me both personally and professionally. I am also aware of when I need to be more of an extrovert. It’s not always easy, but understanding is helpful
Secondly, my diagnosis of dyslexia was like a lightbulb turning on. Maybe like a fluorescent light. It needed a little bit of a starter to give it the oomph and energy to kickstart the process. Then once the lamp was warming up, it flickered a little and let out a little hum and then gradually the light got to the full brightest. That definitely concurs with the learning of my diagnosis.
Finally, learning that I am an over-functioner. Again, a term I had never heard of but I do fit the characteristics and traits of an over-functioner like a glove.
Knowledge of all three of these has really helped me understand more about myself. My quirks and approach to things. Why do I excel in some areas, and struggle in others? How can I be so patient and laidback in some instances, yet highly strung and easily frustrated in others? We’re all on a spectrum or balancing on a pendulum meaning we react and respond to our circumstances and situations.
I’ve been eager to understand more about “how I respond”. The knowledge of the three points above has significantly helped. I understand more. I get less frustrated with myself. There are many things that I am continuing to work on, but spending time learning about myself is enlightening.
So as I am shifting, I realise I am not the same person I used to be. Things I previously tolerated have become intolerable. When I remained quiet, I am now speaking my truth. When I battled and argued, I now choose to remain silent. Most importantly, I now understand that some situations no longer deserve my time, energy or focus.
It’s been nearly a year that I’ve been writing my blog. I’ve learnt a lot and while I continue to write for personal reasons, I am grateful for the time everyone puts into reading my journal.
When I started, I never really knew what route it would take. It was initially to document my move to Portugal and creating Our Farm Portgual. However, in addition to creating a journal of my Portugal adventure, the lens has created a spotlight on me as an individual.
I have honestly learnt more about myself through writing. Often I am asking myself questions and seeking answers. By being transparent, authentic and sharing, I feel much more knowledgeable about myself than I have done in the preceding forty plus years.
The end of the first year is going to end on a high with my scouting trip to Portugal.
As always, if you’ve got this far, thank you. I am humbled and grateful for you taking the time to read.
Obrigado por ler.
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